Mass Effect: Legacies
by Ladyamesindy
Summary: Echoes of the past still haunt Shepard's present.


_As she stood there looking at him, their eyes meeting, she realized at once that it was Horizon all over again. The circumstances and conditions might be different, the words were certainly not the same, but the rest …._

_"Come on, Shepard. Aiming your weapon at the Council … doesn't look good," Kaidan pointed out. _

_Shepard didn't waver, eyes focused only on his, willing him to believe her. Never had it been more important than in this moment. He'd insisted to her, back in the hospital the last time she'd visited him, that he believed her, or at least believed that she wasn't a part of Cerberus, past or present. But right now? Everything about him seemed to indicate he'd forgotten all that. Who had changed his mind?_

_The slightest hint of movement behind him caught her attention just enough. A smug smile, the smirk playing at his lips and in his eyes. Udina. The bastard. It was now clear that he'd wanted Kaidan as a Council Spectre in order to use him against her, no doubt. Shepard's opinions of Udina were well publicized. The councilor had to have known, sure as Hackett and Anderson had, of what Shepard and Kaidan had once had together. And now the man was using Kaidan - playing him off against her, taking care of Udina's dirty work. Kaidan was simply a tool, one being manipulated by the councilor without Kaidan's knowledge. _

_"It's clear," Udina's voice rang out, "Shepard is with Cerberus. Do something, Major!"_

_"I can explain, Kaidan," she told Kaidan calmly, quietly, though deep inside she felt the fear that, around him, was always present. Not a fear of him, but for him as well as for her. So much had happened over the years that they had known each other. From the beginning, she'd known just how much he'd cared. How could she not when it was evidenced in his words, his eyes, his touch? Everything about him had screamed it aloud to her, undeniably. But she'd never been able to reciprocate it, to tell or show him just what he meant to her in return. That it had been there, she did not argue. She knew herself too well. But to show him would have meant risking herself in ways she hadn't since she'd been sixteen and living on Mindoir. Everything had changed for her with the batarian attack. _

_Now though, … now they'd had a chance. Fate had finally brought them both around, back together again and given them the chance to start the process of mending fences. _

_Shepard waved James and Garrus off quickly, and they immediately lowered their weapons. She, on the other hand, did not. "Udina has betrayed us," she told Kaidan, "humanity, the Council, everyone. The salarian councilor confirmed it. Udina is the one who has sold us out to Cerberus."_

_Kaidan shook his head, clearly disbelieving. "Shepard -"_

_"Kaidan, I have never lied to you," she reminded him. "I've never cut corners. You know the truth."_

_"Do something, Major!" Udina screamed. "That's an order!"_

_It was on the tip of Shepard's tongue to remind Udina that the Council did not give orders to Spectres, but before she could she saw another movement. Udina was pulling out a weapon, pointing it at both her and Kaidan now. "No!" she gasped in horrified recognition, reacting without thinking. Closing the distance between them in two quick steps, she reached for Kaidan thinking to push him out of the line of fire … only to have his weapon draw level with her chest. Momentum could not be stopped. In the blink of an eye, she saw the flash as the weapon discharged, felt the sharp sting of a blow that, at this short distance, penetrated her shields and armor and pierced through her flesh. The knowledge that death was imminent was instantaneous. Crumbling to her knees, her eyes lifted to his and held. "Kaidan …."_

_He knelt before her, arms sliding around her in support as his face remained in clear view. She saw the disbelief in his eyes, the tears forming even as she felt the blood pooling behind her lips. She coughed once, saw the spatter of crimson droplets against his armor, the absolute terror and horror growing. "Shepard!" she heard him calling, his voice echoing the pain she'd seen in his eyes ... and then the world went dark around her._

* * *

"Shepard!"

Shepard bolted awake with a start, a raspy gasp escaping her lips, hands rising instinctively to her chest, pressing tightly there. The ache still resonating there, She fully expected them to come away blood-stained. Staring down at them a moment later in horrified fascination, it took strong hands cradling her face to force her attention up to his.

"Shepard, it's okay … you're okay," he promised.

Eyes wide but focusing, chest still heaving from the adrenaline flowing through her system, she found comfort, safety, love in the caramel brown of his eyes. "K-Kaidan," she finally managed. One hand dropped back to the bare skin of her chest, the other lifted to his cheek. "I -"

One of his hands moved to cover hers, turning it so he could place a soft, gentle kiss on the palm. "It's alright, Shepard," he reassured her. "It was just a dream. A nightmare."

Violent shudders rolled through her and in that one moment, she crumpled. Giving in to the stress, the weight of the responsibility she and she alone carried, she allowed herself one opportunity to release it all, to be weak. Folding in on herself, not so silent sobs broke free, and with them the pain and anguish that had been building for so long. That had to have been what triggered the dream, right?

Kaidan's arms surrounded her, supported her, protected her. "Better now?" he asked when she looked up at him. Nodding, she relaxed against him. "Want to talk about it?"

Shepard took a long moment for final contemplation before shaking her head. "No need," she replied. Horizon was well behind them, as was Udina and the Citadel. Shepard recalled an old saying that went, _What doesn't kill you leaves you stronger._ It was time to start living by those words.


End file.
